February 2010
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McGuirk should teach math
Coach: She's hot and she likes me. How's that equation for you? One plus two equals McGuirk.
Lynch: That's amazing.
McGuirk: Two plus four equals she's hot.
Lynch: Mmm, mmm.
McGuirk: Six minus four equals McGuirk's happy.
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Coach McGuirk means a lot to me
Coach McGuirk: But there's no afterlife.
Stephanie: Yes, there is. I mean...we ALL know THAT.
Coach McGuirk: Well, WE all don't because who says there is?
Stephanie: Well, I say there is. We say there is.
Coach McGuirk: Right...But I say there's not, because there isn't. But I'm not good at arguing.
2 tags
this guy on facebook posted a status about how he...
And some girl commented, agreeing with him, while her profile picture was set to Ellen Page dressed in a very Paulie Bleaker track uniform.
I know it’s doppleganger week or whatever but that is just incoherent to me.
1 tag
just to be totally honest
If you can’t watch something on megavideo, you’re fucked. Every media player on the internet is horrible. Except Adult Swim’s.
It’s smooth, it’s fast, it never stutters and it never, ever fucks your life up with buffering.
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“Of course, she’s still gonna die one day. We’re all gonna die.”
– I love how Brian Krakow LOVES SO DEEPLY but is still a REALLY awkward kid who is unintentionally kind of creepy sometimes.
Like now.
January 2010
Zac Efron as Spiderman: there is no way this ends... →
OK magazine is full of shit
1 tag
A Taste of Armegeddon
Dr McCoy: Well Scotty, now you've done it.
Scotty: Aye. The haggis is in the fire for sure.
I'm allergic to the sticky stuff in Band-Aids
it’s official
4 tags
“The PETA ads purport to say, for example, “treating a nonhuman animal as meat is...”
– Meat and metaphors « Kate Harding’s Shapely Prose (via ilovefat)
YES
(via classyandshit)
“FOR THE LOVE OF COCK!”
“And so in search of my Holden, I dated one too many guitarists and boys who...”
– diana vilibert: On Girls and Boys (Who) Like Holden (via nogreatillusion)
2 tags
1 tag
I would be psyched to have the Devil for my father...
The Devil: Uh, hello?
Lucy: Hey, it's me.
The Devil: It's not a good time. Can I--call you back?
Lucy: Oh. Okay. I didn't really have anything to say. I'm just...PISSED. I got in a fight with Jesús.
The Devil: Uhuh. Uhuh. Uhuh.
Lucy: But you know, I don't wanna talk about it.
The Devil: Right right, so, cause I gotta, um--
Lucy: He's SUCH a flirt! It drives me nuts. I was like, Just don't be a slut.
The Devil: Mhmm.
Lucy: And he was like, It's part of my job!
The Devil: Mhmm, mhmm. Luce, can I call you back?
Lucy: And I was like, WHAT?
The Devil: Ughhhh.
Lucy: And he was like, Oh, you wouldn't say that to a baker!
The Devil: Luce, really, really busy night for me, so--
Lucy: Oh! THEN he said he was claustrophobic and I was like WHAT? I was gonna KILL him but then he was like no, I'm actually claustrophobic and I was like, oh. Then he went out and he did body shots on the two skankiest girls I have ever seen.
The Devil: He's...claustrophobic?
Lucy: Yeah.
The Devil: Thank you, Luce.
update on the hall
Haunted by a train? It’s hard to say.
I mean clearly it is wind-blowing noises.
Or it’s a ghost.
Clearly, one of those two things.
there's a ghost in the hall right now
I hope it’s Salinger.
“Mom: So it was pretty much the worst tour imaginable—
me: Yeah?
Mom:...”
– so that happened today
I sat next to a supernodder today in class
it was like sitting beside a bobble-head doll
1 tag
people I hate
update: people who don’t turn off their phones in class
people who you call and then they text you like “omg class!”
people whose phones ring in class (I hate being this person)
people whose phones ring in class more than once (really, dude? really?)
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“I don’t have that much hate about fruits.”
– J
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“Shh, shh, I knew that. I did know that. Deep down. Veeery deep down. In a part...”
– Bee (I need to immortalize this)
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this has been going on for at least two years
jeangreenbean:
cardigangirl:
I’m still convinced that the name Anna Nalick is just an elaborate joke in re: the phrase “an anal lick.”
Seriously. There is no way someone’s name is ACTUALLY Anna Nalick. It’s absurd.
OH MY GOD, exactly. EXACTLY.
2 tags
“I loved Jordan Catalano so much, and talked about him so much, and thought about...”
– My So-Called Life is still my back-to-school jams
1 tag
I accidentally started doing this thing where I...
But it totally works, you should try it.
here's a story about alcohol
When I got back to my room after break, I immediately spied my bottle of gin. It was one of the first things I saw in my mental checklist of “here I am, back at school.”
But I didn’t see the bottle of vodka.
And here’s the thing though: I didn’t look for it. I was so like, paralyzed with fear? That I didn’t even look for it. I just sat on my bed for a couple...
this has been going on for at least two years
I’m still convinced that the name Anna Nalick is just an elaborate joke in re: the phrase “an anal lick.”
Seriously. There is no way someone’s name is ACTUALLY Anna Nalick. It’s absurd.
1 tag
still working on a name
J was telling me how it really offends her when people say that a restaurant isn’t authentic, it’s just where WHITE people go.
“Like we make food specifically for white people. That’s stupid.”
She was pretty pissed.
“It would be like if you took me to a restaurant and told me, this isn’t real white people food. This is just white people food that ASIAN...
1 tag
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friend vocabulary vs parent vocabulary
There was a really close call last night when I almost referred to BJ Novak as “Good Old Blow Job Novak” in front of my parents.
My friends and I are definitely good influences on each other.